June 2009
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“Do you really expect me to not push you up against the wall biotch?”
– Prison Mike
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Ice Cream Man
As I was sitting her in my room Tweeting I heard the sound of the Ice Cream Man!! I remember when I was younger (last summer) me and my sister used to wait by my window until he pulled down our street!! We would then scream out the window “wait, wait, we have money, we are coming, just a second!” he would stop for a minute or so, then begin creeping forward, we would scream again, ha...
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GTA III
So today as I got off the train I felt my pockets for my keys, I thought I must have left them at work!! Before I got on another train and went all the way back I decided to check my car! Sure enough there they were! This is the third time I have locked them in my car at the train station, I have done it more times other places! Anyways the same cop has came the last two time, and I...
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Please Don't Shoot Me!
Partner6: So you're really a 18 yr old girl right?
J-Dogg: Yeah, J for Julie.
Partner6: So whats with the "Dogg"
J-Dogg: Uh, It's cause I'm into the latina gangs and sh*t. You know, rollin with tha homies and sh*t.
Partner6: Oh, uh ok thats cool. So you ever seen a gun?
J-Dogg: Yeah like I got 6 guns.
Partner6: Thats cool, so you wanna see my gun?
J-Dogg: hehe, of course baby.
Partner6: I pull off my pants and show you my "gun".
J-Dogg: Ohh, it's so big.
Partner6: Yeah, what you want to do?
J-Dogg: Umm, i guess stroke it or something.
Partner6: It likes that.
J-Dogg: aight.
Partner6: Keep talking to me baby...
J-Dogg: I kiss you on the mouth, hard, but then gently.
Partner6: Mmmm, daddy like.
J-Dogg: I unzip my pants...
Partner6: Yes, show me what you got.
J-Dogg: I pull out my schlong, and rub it on your breasts...
Partner6: WTF?!
J-Dogg: Oh sh*t, I meant, your schlong! your schlong!
Partner6: I've had it with you queers trying to cyber me, I only f*ck women...
J-Dogg: Sh*t just don't shoot me man, I wasn't serious about the guns I have, I'm unarmed!
Partner6: You dipsh*t.
J-Dogg: I whimper to myself...
J-Dogg: please don't shoot me Mr.
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